True or False: Is Chivalry Dead?
What a loaded question, right?
I don’t expect us to get a solid answer, because there are a lot of variables that determine whether or not chivalry is dead. If you’re a guy and consider yourself a true gentleman, you’d say false. If you’re a guy that’s not a gentleman, you’d probably still say false because you don’t wanna look like a douche. Ladies will have all kinds of answers depending on their experiences.
Personally, I don’t think chivalry is dead, but I do think it’s rare.
There are a lot of great quotes about chivalry (which can be found on this awesome Tumblr page), but one of my favorites is Emma Stone’s line in Easy A:
“Whatever happened to chivalry? Does it only exist in 80’s movies? I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. I wanna ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I want Jake from Sixteen Candles waiting outside the church for me. I want Judd Nelson thrusting his fist into the air, because he knows he got me. Just once, I want my life to be like an 80’s movie… preferably one with a really awesome musical number for no apparent reason.”
Um, yes. All of the above, please.
So what’s the verdict: Is chivalry dead? Why or why not? Holler at yo’ girl!
The Problem With Dating 
8 Responses to “True or False: Is Chivalry Dead?”
It is not dead some women just don’t deserve it.
First of all, wow ImYoMainMan. Who have you been dating?!
Second, Bruna, that’s my fave quote too! I knew we were friends for a reason 😉
And third, I agree with you. I don’t think it’s dead, but it’s definitely rare. It’s not that hard to be at least a little chivalrous! For example: guys should open the door for their ladies! We shouldn’t have to pull an “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man” moment and tell you to open them for us.
I also think guys should offer their jacket if the girl they’re with is cold. It’s not like we’re asking you to place it over a puddle for us to walk over. And sometimes we’ll say we don’t need it, but that doesn’t mean you should stop asking. It’s the little things that show us you care…
I completely agree with you… very rare!
Chivalry is definitely not dead. I was recently having a conversation about this with some friends over dinner. Most of my girl friends had different opinions based on their dating history. They agreed that it is hard to find and technology is definitely not helping with this situation. We thought that a lot had to do with family, maturity, and the way we are raised. If a man has a good relationship with his family, especially his mother or other female role model, he is more likely to behave like a proper gentleman. Similarly, if a woman has a great relationship with her dad, she’ll expect to be treated like a lady. Also, maybe it’s experience, but mature men tend to be more old fashioned when it comes to chivalry. Personally, my parents raised me to be proper, courteous, and well-mannered. Opening the door for anyone, let alone my date, is second nature. It’s sad when chivalry has become so rare that women deem it to be a good trait when it should be a clear necessity. Ladies, this is something you shouldn’t have to bargain for. The greatest tip came from my grandfather. He has been with my grandmother for over 60 years. When I asked him for their secret he told me, “Sometimes it’s the little things you do that make everything count.” He advised that a real gentleman will walk a lady to her house, open her door, offer his arm and walk between her and the sidewalk, give her his jacked when she’s cold, hold her hand as she walks the stairs, pull her chair out, stand and take of his hat off when she excuses herself out of the dinner table… ZzZzZz. Yeah, he fell asleep describing these things, but I got the point. Real men do these things. It’s basics. It’s not asking for a lot. I just don’t do the whole hat thing though, but only cause fedoras are not my style. 😉
-Peace!
Most of the time chivalry is just taken for granted, so it gets to the point of “why bother.” If something is unappreciated then it becomes discouraging regardless if its just the way men should be. Just like it has been mentioned on here, it is rare so when you find it hold on to it.
Chivalry is definitely not dead. I can’t speak for all guys out there, but I know that there are those certain guys out there who still do follow the more chivalrous route when it comes on how to treat a woman. That’s always been a weak suit for me because whenever it comes to a woman that I actually am interested in, I usually go “full gentleman” with them. But typically, my luck runs out with them for a number of reasons, and it’s never because of the way I treat them, it’s usually been for other reasons (usually they haven’t been physically attracted to me or something like that.)
My issue is that that’s been happening waaay too much with the women I’ve been pursuing over the past few years, probably around the amount of time you’ve known me Bruna. So, my chivalrous attitude has kinda taken a back seat when I meet new women. And trust me, my father was born in the 30’s and was what I consider to be a real man because he always knew how to treat women. He taught me to treat women (and I mean more than just opening doors, pulling out chairs and all that jazz). But my mindset is nearly similar to how the first commenter in this thread put it, sometimes I don’t feel that women deserve to be treated like that because I’m unsure if they deserve it. Yes, that is completely fucked up if you take it for face value, but there’s methods to my madness when it comes to this.
Nevertheless, to answer your question more directly, No I do not believe that chivalry is dead because I can confidently say that I am a chivalrous guy. My father didn’t raise an idiot, he taught me how to appreciate and treat women, but lately it’s been a challenge to justify treating a woman they way I have in the past if I know I’m just going to get stomped on the coming weeks/months.
I rambled a little bit, but if you catch my drift with what I’m saying then drop a line and lets chat about it.
-Philly
[…] have the same answer but it’s always a variation of a previous answer. My fellow blogger Bruna was on point when she described that is depends on who you’re […]
Personally, I don’t believe chivalry is dead. I do however think that it all depends if the guy IS chivalrous, & that its not just a kind gesture, but a way of life, character, choice. It’s not about taking the typical cowardly, or lazy way out. I also believe, in my experience at least, it is not appreciated & at times even despised. Or it could be, that women are so used to the lazy & cowardly, that they don’t believe it CAN exist.